The short answer
Wedding dietary restrictions go to the caterer as one written list, by guest name and table, that separates allergies from religious requirements and preferences, in the format and by the date the caterer asks for. Collect each need on the RSVP in the guest’s own words, ask the caterer to confirm in writing how each will be handled, and name one person for questions on the day.
How do you ask about dietary restrictions on a wedding RSVP?
Ask a question on the RSVP that invites detail, such as "Allergies or dietary needs we should share with the caterer," and give it enough space. A tick box for "vegetarian" or "gluten-free" returns a category, not the information a kitchen may need. When a guest writes something short, such as "nuts," follow up and ask them to describe it in their own words: which foods, and anything else they would like the caterer to know.
Record the guest’s own words rather than your summary. "Allergic to tree nuts, including in sauces and garnishes" is different from "avoids nuts," and the caterer is better placed to act on the first. If a guest describes a medical need, you are passing on what they told you, not assessing it; questions about the allergy itself belong with the guest and a medical professional, not with you or the caterer’s sales contact.
- Guest name and party
- The need in the guest’s own words
- Allergy, religious requirement or preference
- Whether the guest will bring anything of their own
- How to reach the guest with a question
Are allergies the same as dietary restrictions?
Allergies are one kind of dietary restriction, and the list works better when they are kept apart from the rest. A kitchen may handle a guest who prefers not to eat pork differently from a guest who says a trace of an ingredient will make them ill, and a list that mixes them makes both harder to read. Sort each entry into one of three groups: an allergy or medical need the guest has described, a religious or cultural requirement, and a preference such as vegetarian or no red meat.
Keep the category as a separate column rather than in the note itself, so you can filter the list and count each group. The caterer can then tell you which entries it needs to discuss with you, and which it can meet by serving an entree already on the menu.
What should I ask the caterer about dietary needs?
Ask the caterer how it wants the list, by when, and whether it charges for separate meals. Then, for each allergy entry, send the guest’s words and ask the caterer to describe, in writing, how that meal will be prepared, how it will be kept separate, and how it will reach the right seat. A clear reply describes steps; a general assurance is a prompt to ask again.
If the caterer says it cannot meet a particular need, that is useful to know early. Tell the guest what the caterer said and let them decide what to do, such as speaking with the caterer directly or bringing their own meal if the venue permits it. Ask the venue whether outside food for one guest is allowed and whether any fee applies.
- List format and deadline
- Any charge for special meals
- How allergy meals are prepared and kept separate
- How the plate reaches the right guest
- Labels on buffet or station food
- Whether a guest may bring their own meal
What should the dietary list for the caterer look like?
One row per guest with a need: name, table number, seat or place-card marker if you use one, entree choice, category, the need in the guest’s words, and the date the caterer confirmed it. Sort by table so a server working one table can find everyone at it.
Number each version and date it. For example, if version 3 went to the caterer on a Tuesday and a guest adds a need on Thursday, send version 4 with the change marked and ask the caterer to confirm it has replaced version 3. Two lists in circulation is how a change gets lost.
What if a guest tells us about a dietary need late?
Send it to the caterer the same day, in writing, as a new version of the list, and ask whether it can still be accommodated. Check your contract for a date after which menu changes are not accepted; the caterer decides what it can do after that date, and the answer may depend on ordering and preparation already done.
Tell the guest what the caterer said. If the answer is uncertain, the guest has the information to make their own plan. Record who you told and when, so the day-of contact is not relying on memory. Update the version number on the list and send the new copy to your day-of contact as well as the caterer.
Who handles dietary questions on the wedding day?
Name one person, such as your planner, venue coordinator or a trusted friend, who has the final list and the caterer’s confirmation and knows which guests to check on. Give the caterer that person’s name and phone number, and ask for the name of the caterer’s own lead on the day.
Ask how guests with allergy meals will be served, for example first at their table, from a separate tray, or with a named server. If you use a marker on place cards, confirm the caterer’s team knows what it means. Keep a printed copy of the list with the day-of contact, in case a phone battery or signal fails.
Guest dietary list for the caterer
Use one row for a decision or deliverable. Keep unanswered items visible. Download the blank worksheet to open in Excel, Numbers or Google Sheets.
On a small screen, swipe the worksheet sideways to see the remaining columns.
| Guest and table | Category | Need in the guest’s words | Caterer’s written reply | Date confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Guest 1 | — | — | — | — |
| Guest 2 | — | — | — | — |
| Guest 3 | — | — | — | — |
| Guest 4 | — | — | — | — |
| Guest 5 | — | — | — | — |
| Guest 6 | — | — | — | — |
| Vendor with a dietary need | — | — | — | — |
| List version and date sent | — | — | — | — |
A message you can make your own
Add your document reference and the questions that apply. You decide what to send and send it yourself.
We are putting together the dietary list for our guests and want to send it in the way that works best for your kitchen. What format and deadline do you need, and is there a charge for separate meals? For the guests listed as allergies, we have included each guest’s own description. Could you tell us in writing how each of those meals will be prepared, kept separate and served to the right seat? Please also let us know who your lead will be on the day.
Common questions
How do I word dietary restrictions on a wedding RSVP?
Dietary restrictions on a wedding RSVP can be worded as one open line, such as "Allergies or dietary needs we should share with the caterer," with room to write. Avoid a short tick list, which returns a category rather than detail. When a guest writes a single word, such as "shellfish," follow up and ask them to describe the need in their own words.
How do I ask for dietary restrictions on a wedding website?
Dietary restrictions on a wedding website are collected the same way as on a paper RSVP: one open question per guest, attached to that guest’s reply, so each need stays with a name. If the website has a separate FAQ, add a line asking guests with allergies to include the details in their reply, and say who to contact with a question.
What dietary restrictions should a wedding menu plan for?
A wedding menu plans for the dietary restrictions your own guests report, not a general list. Guests may describe food allergies, a medical diet such as gluten-free, a religious requirement such as kosher or halal, or a preference such as vegetarian or vegan. Send the caterer your actual list and ask which needs the menu already meets.
Is it my job to judge how serious a guest’s allergy is?
Judging how serious a guest’s allergy is does not fall to you. Pass on what the guest told you, in their own words, and let the caterer say in writing how it will handle the meal. Questions about the allergy itself are for the guest and a medical professional, not for you or the caterer’s sales contact.
Do dietary restriction meals cost extra at a wedding?
Dietary restriction meals at a wedding may cost the same as the entree, a different price, or nothing extra, depending on the catering contract. Check the contract for a line on special meals, and if it is silent, ask the caterer to state the price in writing, including whether service charge and tax apply, and keep the reply with your list.
Should I tell guests what the caterer said about their meal?
Telling guests what the caterer said about their meal lets each guest with an allergy or requirement decide whether to speak with the caterer directly or make their own plan. Share the caterer’s written reply rather than your summary of it, and note on the list the date you passed it on.
What if the caterer cannot meet a guest’s dietary need?
When a caterer cannot meet a guest’s dietary need, tell the guest promptly and ask the venue whether the guest may bring their own meal and whether a fee applies. Record the answer on the list, and tell the caterer what the guest decides, so the kitchen and the servers plan for that seat.